Happiness.

Like the title says. That's exactly what I'm feeling.

It's day 6 of my fast and I can't feel anymore motivated. I haven't stepped on the scale, but when one isn't eating, it's obvious they'll lose weight. So I have absolutely no doubts.

I've still been debating about writing a bit about what has happened since I haven't been around. But I've decided not to. The blog is purely for positive, encouraging thoughts. No more negatives. And talking about some of the things that happened, about three months ago, would be contradicting that positive aura.

Of course, after that month of January, things could not have been any better. Like I mentioned in my last post, my boy is back in my life. And I'd be lying if I said he wasn't the most important person in my life, because he really is. He's taking care of me, all while I do this. I appreciate it, that he's being so opened minded. I told him I was blogging again, and I don't know if he's reading, but if you are, I'm going to prove to you that the blog won't upset you anymore. Things are different now. :]

Also, because I absolutely love the drink and it is the healthiest and best tasting thing I have tried... I'm going to mention it. Skinny Water. No calories. No carbs. No sugar. No preservatives. Can you say replacement for half of my water? I think yes. It tastes JUST like juice, it's hard to tell that you're not drinking some sort of sugary drink. I suggest it to all of you. It's a better replacement for soda and coffee (one of them has natural caffeine for those of you that need that fix) and you'll feel better about drinking it. It's not one of those nasty powder drinks that you have to choke down I assure you. And replacing coffee is the best thing you could ever do. By drinking coffee, you lose many healthy vitamins in your body, which could cause many health issues. I never suggest drinking coffee on a regular basis if you're not eating (or even if you are!)

With that said, I am done blogging for the day. Buh bye. :]

A Tough Reform

It seems as though it has been so long since I have posted. So much has occurred since my being away, that I feel if I catch all of my old readers up with it, it may take too long. So I'd simply like to only say a few things.

It seems that many cases of anorexia manage to find some sort of relief. Those who "suffer" from it, somehow manage to "get better". But the thing that I'm sure many of you understand is that one never completely gets better. We just learn to deal with it. And that burden of dealing usually ends up sending us back into a deep hole of relapse.

I don't consider myself anorexic. I mean, a doctor would probably say I am. But whatever it is that's wrong with me, at some point I do want to end it. But right now, is just not that time. I feel like I need a fast. I need to feel what I used to feel. That's exactly what I'm going to do. And to "fix" myself after the fast, I'm going to eat healthily and end this horrible cycle of eating and not eating. I know I've said it so many times, and it's so much easier said than done, but I have a good feeling about everything this time. My boyfriend supports it again. With his support... I feel safe, I feel like I can do it and I can end it.

So I'm going to fast. My boyfriend has given me the allotted time of a month. I am allowed to treat my food intake however I like for that time, but after that he will no longer allow it. So I'm using this as a time to do my best at fasting, and after that I am returning to my healthy eating habits since after this month I am no longer allowed to fast.

Join me. Follow me. Give me your thoughts.