So I've done some thinking. With the elyptical here (though not set up), I won't feel so guilty about eating. I can exercise, and eat, and still lose weight. And with making a promise to my boyfriend that I wouldn't fast for more than two days at a time, I'm going to be doing just that... fasting only two days out the week, and eating normally the rest. Normally as in... 1200-1500 calories. I know, it sounds disgusting, but I'm really trying to fix my problem. For me, so I don't have to watch my hair start to fall out or my nails crack from lack of nutrients. For my boyfriend and my family and my friends, so they don't have to worry about me anymore.

I want to start to enjoy life, not let food control it.

I know fasting still won't help. But this is a process that's going to take time. I'll start slow, until I'm completely back on a healthy track. For now, I'm going to keep fasting but try to keep it to a minimum. And maybe, if I'm successful, I can be somewhat of an inspiration for others to try and help themselves, while still being thin just like we all want. :]

So here's to a hopefully healthy week. Tomorrow and Tuesday will be a fast, the rest of the week will be filled with eating. I cringe at the thought of it, but I'll try and get used to it.

For you, baby.