It's been a while since I've actually posted an update. It's mostly because I've been living like a fat cow for the past week. I fasted successfully for about four days, and then Halloween fucked it up. I really wish I just hadn't eaten any candy and kept fasting. I was doing great, feeling amazing with an empty stomach. And then I fucked it up. I haven't really binged, I've just been... eating. Too much. I feel fat. I feel bloated. Mom went grocery shopping so I'm forced to eat or else the food goes bad. My boyfriend insists on buying me food after school. I need to eat this fucking food until it's gone and then get back on track. I haven't followed my plan at all since Halloween so I'm disappointed in myself. 130 pounds feels so fat. I miss 122. My boyfriend keeps telling me that he loves me how I am, but he's always touching my hips and telling me how amazing they are. I want them to show more, I want him to admire them more. I so badly want 115 pounds. No, I want 110 pounds. I want to be weightless. My boyfriend is about 135. He's so skinny, I love it. We're both skinny, but I want to be skinnier.

I have to go now, though. Going with the boyfriend to a party for his mom's town supervisor election. Maybe I'll post again soon.

Think thin, everyone. We're all able to reach size zero. :]